• We are only here to accompany each other home

    Ram Dass

    Geistliche Begleitung

Spiritual Guidance I

– What is it and what is it good for?

Many people experience profound spiritual moments—encounters with God, peak experiences, inner transformations. But how can such experiences be lived in everyday life? How do you avoid radicalism while remaining open to change? Some ask themselves: Do these experiences bring clarity or rather confusion? And where do we put them when there is hardly any room for them in our social environment?

Even after dramatic life events, many people question their concept of God—longing for connection, direction, and renewed trust. In such spiritual crises, they often feel alone or misunderstood.

The central question of this page is therefore:
How can God be experienced in everyday life?
How does the sacred find a place in my life?
How do I follow my own spiritual path – and who will walk it with me?

My personal path

I, Esther Sühling, ask myself these questions again and again—not just with my head, but with my heart. I'm struggling to find my path. Meditation is good for me, but I don't meditate all the time. Sometimes I ask myself: Do others think I'm unworldly or even crazy? And I often hear: "You studied—so why do you still believe it?"

What helps me is that I'm not alone. Others are already a step or two ahead, have had similar experiences—and are supporting me. That gives me support.

I myself have completed training in spiritual direction. I receive guidance and I guide others – and I regularly exchange ideas in groups where openness and trust are possible.

Spiritual Guidance II

Forms of spiritual guidance

Spiritual guidance can take many forms:

  • Individual conversations with people who are also on a spiritual journey
  • Conversations in groups or with friends
  • Support from trained spiritual companions

What they all have in common: It's not about guidance, but rather accompaniment. The focus is on the individual path—not on the facilitator's ideas. Good accompaniment opens up spaces and pays attention to what calls within.

Find the right companion

As with the search for a suitable therapist, mindfulness is required here, too. The term "spiritual guidance" is not protected, and many services are little known. So it's worth looking around—and taking the time to find out who's truly a good fit for you.

Directories of trained spiritual directors can be found, for example, in:

  • the Protestant regional churches
  • the Catholic dioceses
  • deaneries or church districts
    (You will find links and addresses below.)

In the Lukasevaangelium This is probably the most well-known story of spiritual guidance and serves as a model for many (Luke 24:15 ff)

“While they were talking and reasoning (two disciples on the road to Emmaus), Jesus himself came and went with them.  But they, as if struck blind, did not recognize him.  "What are you discussing with each other?" Jesus wanted to know. The disciples stood there sadly, and Cleopas, one of the two, remarked in astonishment: "You are the only one in Jerusalem who knows nothing about the events of the last few days."

The disciples of Emmaus recounted everything that had happened and what was troubling them. Jesus, above all, listened. He accompanied them. And he explained the background, the meaning behind it all, using the Holy Scriptures. At the end, he is invited: "Lord, stay with us, for it is toward evening and the day is far spent." Jesus continues to accompany them, accepting the invitation.

“…So he went into the house with them. When Jesus had sat down with them to eat, he took the bread, gave thanks to God, broke it, and gave it to them. Then their eyes were opened: It was Jesus. But at that moment he disappeared, and they could no longer see him. They said to one another, "Didn't we feel deeply moved while he talked to us on the road and explained the Scriptures to us?"

Spiritual Guidance III

Who accompanies?

First of all, it's the person I trust and who helps me grow. Spiritual direction becomes spiritual guidance by being asked and asked.

Trained spiritual directors are people who are themselves on a spiritual path and who continue to receive regular guidance even after their training. They listen, ask questions, and help with discernment—but they don't dictate the path.

At the heart of accompaniment is the relationship to the divine mystery of the person being accompanied.
The question in the accompaniment is: “What helps me, what hinders me, to God?” (Nicholas of Flüe)

Spiritual guidance can be provided through meditation, Bible readings, discernment of spirits, bodywork, or simple conversation. It is a process that integrates into one's life and consciously includes God.

If it doesn’t fit – you can leave

Spiritual guidance can nourish and strengthen – but not just any guidance is right for you. As with therapy, it requires trust and resonance. If you feel that guidance isn't serving you well, you can leave. This isn't a sign of weakness, but rather an expression of inner clarity.

It is your path.
Not the path of the companion.
God speaks to each person in his or her own way – and each person has his or her own language to encounter God.

You don't have to walk the path alone.
Sometimes a heart that listens,
already a piece of heaven on earth.

Another biblical story about spiritual guidance is found in the book of Job.
Job had suffered one blow after another, had lost his children, his wealth, almost everything.

"When Job's three friends heard of all the misfortune that had befallen him, they came, each from his own place […] to mourn and comfort him. […] And they sat with him on the ground for seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his pain was very great."

This scene demonstrates a silent form of accompaniment: simply being there, without words, compassionately and presently. Even if the friends later fail with their speeches, this first week is a good example of spiritual accompaniment.

Links to lists of trained spiritual directors

Here you will find links to the Protestant regional churches where, to our knowledge, spiritual guidance is offered after training. You can also complete training to become a spiritual guide there yourself. These lists are only suggestions; there are also spiritual guides who are not listed. They are intended only as a starting point for those interested.

Spiritual guidance in the Evangelical Lutheran Church in Northern Germany: https://www.gottesdienst-gemeinde.de/werke-und-arbeitsbereiche/kirche-und-gemeindeentwicklung/spiritualitaet/geistliche-begleitung

Evangelical Church of Berlin-Brandenburg-Silesian Upper Lusatia https://akd-ekbo.de/wp-content/uploads/EKBO-Liste_GeistlicheBegleitung.pdf

Evangelical Church in Westphalia on the Spiritual Accompaniment Forum: https://forum-geistliche-begleitung.de/
and other offers about https://meditation-westfalen.de

Evangelical Church in the Rhineland: https://www.ekir.de/inhalt/geistliche-begleitung

Evangelical Church in Hesse-Nassau https://www.zentrum-verkuendigung.de/gottesdienstkultur/geistliches-leben/geistliche-begleitung/

Evangelical Church of the Palatinate: https://www.evkirchepfalz.de/fileadmin/public/internet/03_dokumente/IKF_Flyer_Geistliche_Begleitung.pdf

Evangelical Church of Anhalt: https://www.landeskirche-anhalts.de/arbeitsfelder/geistliche-begleitung

Evangelical Church of Baden: https://www.ekiba.de/infothek/arbeitsfelder-von-a-z/glaube-spiritualitaet/spiritualitaet-im-alltag/wo-die-seele-atmen-kann/geistliche-begleitung/

Evangelical Church of Württemberg: https://www.geistlich-leben.de/geistliche-begleitung

Evangelical Lutheran Church in Bavaria: https://ganzhier.de/wege/geistliche-begleitung/

In addition, Protestant communities also offer spiritual guidance, as do many Catholic monasteries:

https://www.evangelische-kommunitaeten.de/angebote/exerzitien/

If this list is incomplete, I encourage everyone to seek guidance on their spiritual journey. Otherwise, ask in your community, in your church district, or online. You are not alone.

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